that's what eric asks in episode 11 of season 2. it doesn't get any more clear than that. and then there's a standoff with vampire bill who's all " you're pathetic, eric" but eric isn't phased out or anything. that's my vampire.
also eric likes kids (and not in a vampire way) and that adds extra points to his awesomeness. he does tricks for them, y inclus the superman take off.
long story short - episode 11 is sort of a "in between" episode. everyone - vampire humans and shapeshifers - runs around to solve the maryann problem. we get to see the vampire queen of louisiana (btw, that dainty leg wan't hers) and bill is stuck with a long match of game with dice whose name in english i can't find right now.
and of course we have the cliffhanger at the end where sookie is surrounded by a lot of bug-eyed people - including lafayette. i am dissapointed in you, lafayette.
on a related note - district 9 is the best alien movie i've ever seen. and it confirms my theory about what humankind would actually do if we ever meet aliens - chop 'em up! kill 'em all! experiment on 'em! horde them in slums! and then you wonder why they don't dare approaching us.

the latest True Blood episode.
Also, Beyond Here Lies Nothin'. Just awesome

a short history of horror movies -my personal favourite decade is the 90's. but they do not mention anything about movies such as "The Cabinet of Dr. Cagliari" or "Nosferatu". In my personal and humble opinion, those movies are scarier than any of those listed above.
Halloween 2 (or 10, whatever) is worse than The Final Destination. Uh, i don't care.. Why would I (or anyone for that matter) would want to see those movies and pay for them.
Twilight in the 80's! Because... well, somebody actually thought to make it up. And River Phoenix would be Edward Cullen

that's yet another new moon trailer (fanmade). and it has shirtless edward! NO, REALLY. and to think edward was supposed to have long flowing hair (heeeeeeee!) the volterra scene would have been a complete louis rip-off.
or maybe he could have been a rock-star. flowing hair and red velvet jacket. truly. and aro looks nothing like i imagined. caius is kinda cool though. i am having issues with the bright red eyes though ... they're more like stoplights than crimson-menacing.
and bella just filmed her graduation scene. awwwwwww!
also, i am doing a radio show about movies! well, technically today i had the second show, yet it was better than the first. whee!

winter. cold weather, in general.
conspiracy theories of any kind. humanity is doing a fabulous job at creating problem by itself. there's no need for a super secret group to scheme wars and evolution and stuff - and even if such a group existed there would be another group(s - the plural is actually much more probable) wanting to take the aforementioned group's power. plus, we're finite, therefore our control is also finite and the heirs can always decide to join a hippie commune. yes, humans and extremely violent, predatorial, greedy and competitive and always and i mean always seeking trouble with the wrath of an angry god. it's in our genes and the whole "the evil shadowy group is responsible for wars and plagues" is just a flimsy justification of ... well, pretty much everything that happened since the dawn of civilization. might as well blame it on any god and call it a day.
people who think women are worse drivers than men. actually the proportion of bad drivers is pretty much equal in both sexes. and men ARE responsible for the vast majority of deadly accidents (true fact).
women who try to be men just to feel "empowered". they come across as mean bitches.
rudeness. and here i am talking to you, tourists who walk in without so much as saying hello... man, if it isn't written anything on that goddamn building it doesn't mean you can just walk in like you own the place. and the beach balls aren't for sale! also, i am thinking about those who think that yelling and talking down to people will make them superior.
mountains. mountains in winter. make me claustrophobic and depressed.
people who take themselves too seriously. in this category are included the jaded bloggers of doom.
related to the above question of rudeness: gratuitous vulgarity. it's not funny. it's not even interesting. it's not cool. it's plain distateful. call me a prudish libra, but that's how i feel.
the whole "say it like it is" attitude which usually translates in "let's be rude to eachother like whoa". if you're not happy with something, you CAN convey your message just as effectively in a nice tone, without hurting the other. i'm old-fashioned like that.
romanian movies (all of them). they present a grim, vulgar, jaded world that doesn't express anything remotely similar to my view of the world i am living in.
xenophobics, racists, homophobics, haters of any kind in general and PREACHERS. i dislike preachers, although they are, at a certain level, amusing. also, organized religions, but that's because people are lazy enough as to have beliefs fed to them with a spoon.

*bill compton has a Wii! Whee! i like vampire bill so much better now!
so, sookie, jason and bill go back to bontemps from texas. bill travels in a specially designed case, courtesy of anubis airlines or sth. meanwhile, sookie has another freaky nasty dream where she consoles eric northman who cries tears of blood. and she kisses his cheeks and eric does the seduction thing and his fangs pop (AHAHAHAHA... *special note to people of true blood - please do sth about the fangs. it's just too hilarious when they pop like that. also, vampires running around shouldn't look like a scene from a benny hill sketch. but i'm being fussy about things now)
they finally arrive in bontemps where maryann has taken over and everyone has bug-eyes and the crazy. except sam (because he's a shapeshifter), andy (probably because he drinks too much), lafayette (because he's too awesome, but in a different way than eric) and tara's mom (because she repented? or maybe because she already works for a different god and doesn't go to parties? i don't know..)
anyway, the stackhouses are back in town to save everybody. sookie confronts maryann (look, if someone did that mess to my house i'd rip her head off too. supernatural creature or not) but maryann goes bwahahhaaha and threatens her at which point bill steps in and chugs the maenad's neck. apparently maenad blood ain't good for vamps, because bill starts throwing up like whoa and so, it's up to sookie and her secret sparkle to save his ass. yes sookie does a sparkly thing with her hands (spoilers ahead: she's got fairy blood)and bill is WOW, how did you do that!
sookie: no time, chop chop!
on the way to safety, bill goes a little emo about not being able to protect sookie (AGAIN)
sookie:we should call Eric. like, totally.
bill: *barf barf barf WHA...? NO, YOU HOR, WE DON'T CALL NO ERIC! *barf barf... also, give me some of your blood, i'll be just fine.
sookie: does it. and everyone knows she should have called Eric because not even a Maenad can stand up to him.
since we're still at sookie saving people, she also exorcizes tara from the maryann spell. but before that, lafayette delivers another awesome line: "Just because god and i have agreed to see other people, it doesn't mean we don't talk to eachother anymore"
on another note, jason rises from the stupid, puts his ash on (chainsaw and nailgun included) and saves sam and andy who have been hiding in the refrigerator at merlotte's. jason also does an impersonation of the horned god for the masses and everyone cheers.
also jessica goes ballistic at hoyt's mom (who's got the crazy) and chomps her neck or so we are made to believe.
in the end bill goes to the queen to maybe solve the maryann problem and... we're left with the picture of a dainty leg covered in blood.

eric's awesome awesomeness reaches epic proportions in this one. let me count you the ways:
1. eric shelters sookie from shards thrown by suicide bomber (he's a better protector than you, BILL). then bill nances in and the following dialogue ensues:
eric: go hunt humans or sth, bill.
and bill DOES IT.
eric: omg sooooookieeeeeee, i will die, am so injured from protecting you, i got shards of silver under my skin...
sookie: fine, i'll fetch godric to save you.
eric: no such time. suck the silver from my veins.
sookie: it's ...ewwww (*actual line. i was laughing so hard at this point)
eric: DO IT, WOMAN, CAN'T YOU SEE I'M DIEING HERE???
sookie - stares
eric: i mean....pleasee... i'll...die? *bats eyelashes
sookie: does it
bill - comes back from hunting zee eevil humans. has very understandably the WTF are you doing with my woman stare
2. eric - smirks. because there was a very sexless sex scene. OMINOUS
bill: but he wasn't going to die sooooooooookieeeeeeeeeeee!!! and you just drank his blood and that means you'll have freaky nasty thoughts with eric! (i'd like to point out that bill did give some blood to sookie early in the first season so it's a pot calling the kettle black moment)
sookie: NEVER! I hate you so much eric northman, wish you were dead!
eric: i love you too, baby.
3. then sookie has a freaky nasty dream with eric and there we discover that he has a heart and he's so in love and seductive. no really, we didn't see that coming... also, eric thinks sookie vampires better than bella swan! actually, she will vampire better than anyone! yay! and then he kisses her.
4. eric gets a punch from bill-the-pot and he doesn't punch back. under sookie's eyes. and in his head he's doing victory laps with a huge crowd yelling U.S.A! U.S.A! I'M DA MAN!!!!!
5. eric cries tears of blood because godric wants to commit suicide by sun. under sookie's eyes (again). then, before he dissipates in a cloud of sparkles, godric asks sookie to take care of eric (and we know she will do it, by all the gods, because that's a vamp's last wish. also because eric is totally hot)
6. eric is hot and this must be mentioned with a separate number. he's also taller than bill, blonder and with awesome shoulders. it doesn't hurt that he's very badass and devious. like i said, i'd love an eric northman to just waltz in and glower at all the things that are not right in my life. they'd magically disappear (a girl can dream, can't she?)
also, lafayette is completely awesome at kicking eggs and dragging tara away from evil maryann. and y'all know lafayette has some eric blood in him and not even maryann wants to mess with that.
also, sam turns into a fly and jessica meets hoyt's mom and the old bat gets bitchy but hoyt is a man and stands up for his tru luv.
like i said previously:
best.series.ever

no, really.That would be Nosferatu for you.

why is tarantino awesome. the inglorious basterds review. Also:

'Inglourious Basterds' Has A Glorious Opening In The Saturday Box Office Report- 14 milions yesterday.

Is Jackson Rathbone the Next Orlando Bloom? that's a good question...

New still of Alice!

Catherine Hardwicke is doing a gothic retelling of the Little Red Riding Hood with a love triangle and werewolves. I will set a CH shrine in my house and worship her now. Because originally That Story is exactly about coming of age in a woman. Paths of pins or path of needles anyone? So yes, i am loving the idea so much.

Will Rpattz overcome his Edward image? I don't care, really...
WTF Forever Dawn? Are you people for real?? I am already seeing a greedy producer getting ready for a fifth installment.. * later edit. OMG, I was actually right about that...
Remakes of the week - Excalibur and The Yellow Submarine
Even Eomer is a vampire. In the same movie with James. Yes, i know, that bridge movie PJ is planning shows that all the characters in LotR are bloodsuckers that love emo teenagers. Except Elrond, who is actually a werewolf.
Milla Jovovich got married. Suprisingly, her new hubby is nor a vamp, nor a werewolf.

*short epiphany. His Royal Hotness starred in Stardust. i don't know how i missed that.
speaking of His Royal Hotness - there's a new movie poster for Dorian Gray. Expect funky video done this fall. i am so liking the idea of Ben Barnes as Dorian, i can't even express it in words.
they started shooting Eclipse in Vancouver.
that translates in "more shirtless boys AND more fuckwittery". hee hee. let's just hope the new director plays along and sticks to the insanity. dialing it up a notch wouldn't be a bad idea either. and since the changing of directors is a tradition in twilight movie saga, i would suggest david fincher of the other david - cronenberg - for breaking dawn. (hint: mutant baby vampire is born after a c-section edward performs with his teeth. and then jacob falls in love with said baby. awesome)
inglorious basterds premieres this week-end. this one doesn't have vampires, but a tarantino movie about a squad kicking nazi ass is definitely worth your time.
didn't i tell you that werewolves are all the rage? Even Benicio del Toro is one.
Also, Robert Zemeckis is remaking the Yellow Submarine.
There will be three Hobbit movies and P.J. is directing one of them. Let's call him the Dark Lord, owner of the One Ring. When is he making the Silmarillion? I mean, technically the bridge movie will be inspired by it but then there's an epic amount of history BEFORE the third age (valar, elves, melkor and beren and luthien, among other stuff) and i just know P.J. is doing black magic right now to get his hands on that as well. Also, will Aragorn be back? Can Ben Barnes be the young Aragorn?? Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaseeeeeeeeeeeeee... And can we see Leggy again??
There will be a Wolverine sequel. Yep, we totally didn't see that coming.
Paul Bethany is fighting a Twilight vampire. I am not kidding, James will be back.
so, in conclusion, Twenty 2010 Movies To Get Excited About

stardust and kylie minogue

it's official. i'm putting the twilight series on the top of my guilty pleasures list. yeah, i did a music video about it and i had much fun and i'm not sorry about that. so there. has bella, edward, jacob and girls aloud. i did not intend to infringe anyone's copyright and anyway it's their fault.

that would be the second one. it's officially out on the net so youtube people can stop hunting down users who post it without permission

didn't i tell you it has LOTS and i mean OMG LOTS of scenes with half-naked werewolves? also, jacob almost kisses bella. and eddie has an attempt at being half-naked himself and he clearly kisses bella, because this is what this movie will be about. in conclusion: jacob 1 - edward 1. jacob gets 1 point for the abs and pecs (he did work hard at reshaping his body) and edward gets 1 point for the kiss. although i am going to be biased here and point out that too much muscle in the form of jacob is sort of a personal turn-off. what? in real life i don't like buff guys. the whole climbing on the window makes me starry-eyed though, since it's an incredibly romantic thing to do.
also, i found my isolde in form of Mia Wasikowska

with sarah and sean. features bloods, bruises and drama. yes, it's from different movies, no, i don't care.
and then at the end there's a girl with a gun and that's all shades of awesome.

a little bit of me dies slowly each day. also, the district 9 trailer, which looks awesome:

i've got the crazy again. what? vampires are all the rage now and ... werewolves too. did i mention taylor lautner is an aquarian? we all know what that means. so basically, in the second trailer we've got many and i mean MANY shirtless werewolves running around. and jacob climbs bella's window "what snore doth yonder window break?" and then they hug and i swear that's a copy/paste from the romeo+juliet movie. also, after that scene, in r+j there was sexing, but no such thing in new moon. but there is a definite possibility of a kiss. i am starting to like chris weitz after this video, he seems to have brought MOAR melodrama to the story (yes, there is such thing). what? do you think i read those books for any deep meaning? it was the love triangle and the emo and the gratuitous whining that made me giggle and feel good and squee. and we didn't even get to the part where they camp out in the woods.

today premieres the new moon trailer with jacob AND edward showing off their pecs. har har

yahoo blog and I broke up. Mostly because he decided that my last two posts were not worthy of being published. And because he does not like pictures from my computer. So anyway... I will link this new blog to the profile on yahoo because that is the least he can do after that long relationship we had and because I hate that sort of break up where you close all communication channels.
Also, the last post that was supposed to be posted there and it didn't show up for some reason but I had the smart idea of saving on the computer :
True Blood season 2, episode 8

bad girlfriend moves - sam 2, jason 1

I am putting 2 for sam because: 1. he discovers the body of his love interest/shape shifter in the refrigerator at merlotte's with her heart torn out from her chest after her failed assassination attempt and 2. the police arrests him because they think he did it. i'd add an extra 1/2 point for maryann cooking the heart of daphne and serving it to tara and EGGS (yes, his name is EGGS. sister likes a guy named EGGS. and EGGS killed daphne) who eat it and then go into a frenzy because maryann is a maenad and this is what maenads do.

jason gets only 1 point because - preacher's wife actually shot him with a paintball gun (are you for real??) and then he has an epiphany. like, omg, vampires aren't bad and also, let's save sookie. Now, let’s get back to the vamps.

Last episode ended with “Godric, OMGWTF, where is Eric???” so, basically, Godric is the first one to save Sookie from the evil rapist guy. Also, Godric looks like a Frodo with tattoos and he gets extra cookie points for the gray sweater he wears in this specific episode. Then Eric joins the party at which point I am squeeing with delight because he’s in full “let’s rip those humans like a piñata” mode. But Godric then says to let the humans be, in typical Frodo fashion and Eric offers to sacrifice himself for his maker AND Sookie. And they bind him with silver chains and all to an altar.

But the rescue operation continues and in nance Bill who bashed the head of his maker with a plasma screen and Jason who had the “vampires aren’t bad and also don’t touch my sister” epiphany. Also, the Texas Dept. of Vampire Justice who’s ready to rip throats. Tattooed Frodo then says:

“Nah, let those humans be, because we’re superior philosophical beings”. And we all know what happened to Frodo when he let Gollum be.

And then they have a vampire party at Frodo’s place. For real. Which also features a catfight between Sookie and Lorena, the maker of Bill, but Frodo steps in and parts the crazy and Lorena cries tears of blood because she luuuuuuuuuuuuvs Bill who prefers human Sookie. Also, Eric is back to his usual snarky and scheming self, has a tank top to show off his vampire muscles and has a meaningful conversation with Bill:

Bill : Lay off my human from now on or I cut you

Eric: No, because I’m too awesome, also the books say we’ll get freaky nasty, your human and I

Bill: Man, I hate you

And a suicidal-bomber-with- silver-chains-strapped-on-his-chest steps in and threatens to kill all the vampires. Fade to black.