so it's that time of the year (again) when it's snowing (again. wtf, it's a little early, we sort of have snow in january. end of january, usually. i'm just saying, i never dreamed of white christmas, where are you global warming????) and it's freezing outside and everyone on facebook is sort of like "yay, snow" (we all ARE children of the postmodern age. facebook is like a virtual agora. for those who are so excited about the snow - sometimes i just want to punch you in the face)
also: differences. it's always interesting to notice them and see the dynamic they create. i said interesting, but not always fun.

thing no. 1 - saturn+psyche+dark moon in scorpio = irrepressible urge to go scouring into the other's soul. with the subtlety of an army tank.
thing no. 2 - shiny lulz, regained faith in the universe
thing no. 3 - ILU BB

in an age of everything and everyone going absolutely berserk - and i am so not kidding, looks like everyone is starting their own personal revolution - i just need MOAR pretty. pretty saves my day and keeps my universe functional. therefore i will go see twilight (because i saw all the sparkly saga and the characters make me look so normal by comparison), sleep more, actively militate for romance and mush and stay away from anything that does not concern my person.

someone said that libra is like aries with a diploma from charm school. oh, okay, that is trufax of life. we enjoy quests and crusades just as much as aries. just that they're of a different nature.
also: love. in progress - drop-dead gorgeous energetic che guevara meets relationship junkie with a streak of decadence. actual love ensues complete with days of  ironing t-shirts at 5 am or days with coffee in bed at 10.30.

look, i knew it all along, okay? there's a reason why aquarians and librans go well together - you just have to find the right aquarian (and the EPIC AWESOME PART is when he is actively trying to make you happy.  and you get to wake up together every morning and you get to do other stuff than wondering what the hell is going on which is a huge step forward for humanity in general. the feeling of actual progress is a huge boon and the fact that there are no nightmarish discussions over the SAME OLD UNRESOLVED ISSUES is such a relief)

current music: meravigliosa creatura



i am aware that aquarius deals with communication with the masses, which i do for a living anyway, but today was one of those days where I reached a peak in that area. even had an impromptu voice-conference on how and why text and images should be sent in roughly the same time frame, that is not three days later, seriously people, it's in your best interest. we'll see how that turns out.
also, leo-all-father is visiting and he was tinkering with the electricity this morning. results so far: a lot of rubble on the bathroom shelf. to tell the truth, his engineering skills surpass his engineering skills by far but whatever, as long as it keeps his occupied and happy.
it's such a beautiful day outside...and yes, i am feeling a bit spaced out and romantic.

saw the avengers, which was basically THE fire-signs movie. mostly it was about people kick each other's ass and blowing stuff up with the wrath of an angry god (actually we had 2 angry gods in there and one of them was Leo, which, naturally was the EPIC BLONDE HERO. the other one was the aquarian hell-bent on taking over the world while proclaiming he's here to free mankind from the burden of free will. and let me tell you, he basically embodied the philosophy of every aquarian i know - that of the extreme paradox. if there's someone out there capable of freeing you of the burden of freedom, it's an aqua. because unreasonable it's something they are proud of being)
also, saw jane eyre today, the one with mia and michael fassbender. which was nice and i really want ... no, actually i don't. as far as epic angsty romance goes, i promise to stick to my own kind because it's the kind i understand. or at least i am used to it and it makes me look relatively sane by comparison.
i want hot water back. pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease!!!!!!! i need to wash my hair with water not heated on the stove and take an actual shower which does not involve frigid water.
also, i am tired. but let's face it, this summer was probably one of the best i had in the recent past so i will not complain too much. except for the lack of actual spare time to do other stuff.

true blood rulez - finally caught up with the new season! eric and bill are BFFs! sookie sort of tried to sleep with alcide-the-hot-werewolf after murdering his ex-girlfriend, but then russel edgington (which they buried in concrete some 2 seasons ago) showed up and all hell broke loose. also, i have a thing for fairies now (especially the one called claude, who is attractive in many many many ways). and there's lilith showing up but i am not happy with her portrayal..just for the record, in my personal opinion, she is the original feminist and individualist who basically thought it was not ok to obey some arbitrary rules so she walked off and had the subsequent pow-wow, but she does not look the type to desire followers. or at least that sort of fanatical followers who want to convert other people to their own system of belief. and that's why organized religion is bad for you.
on the current political situation - my conclusion is that the only ones to blame are the people who vote. and since they act like a mass of complete idiots lured either by hate speeches or promises of the second coming on earth (seriously, have you seen the posts on facebook? not one of them included a list of logical arguments based on which to vote for or against the impeachment of the president. it was just "do it because reasons and if you don't do it you are really a bad person and probably you will end up in hell" and it all sounded like an organized religion speech. AND SO MANY MANY PEOPLE BOUGHT THAT WITHOUT EVEN THINKING ONE SECOND) they have absolutely no right to complain. they have practiced their constitutional right to be idiots and uneducated savages, now deal with it! those in power are merely a reflection of your choices.

since apparently mercury in leo is good for keeping journals and i am in a vague mood for contemplating ....stuff.
1. i was under neptune's spell last summer, which was possibly one of the worst summers in my personal history for a lot of reasons including a bout of denial who wasn't just a river in egypt. in conclusion: real touchable life is infinitely better in all its infinite madness than living in a dream
2. transiting lilith, venus and jupiter through the first house of self was probably one of the best things ever. they brought on the awesome. EPIC AWESOME. excuse me for wanting a whole lot more of that, don't stop here, pleaseeeeeeeee
3. apparently, i am honing my powers of bitchcraft which isn't quintessentially my fault. i had to deal with a lot of mad people in my life
4. what's the deal with meeting so many scorpios? is it a karmic thing or something? i am used to meet fellow air-signs but these people operate on an entirely different level and they're sooooo sensitive. which brings us to the next point: i come from the school of roll-with-the-punches air plus i had to deal with a lot of mad people in my life which inherently makes the whole perspective on life slightly skewed. i don't understand ego and probably a lot of other things and yes, i am very blunt because life taught me so.
5. geminis rock. not all of them, possibly, but at least some

...i have no idea where this sudden burst of energy came from, but i'm acting like the efficiency fairy lately which is slightly stunning. i finished the dress for the girl, which came out pretty, my dress for oana's wedding, which is emerald green silk and floats around and a whole lot of work plus some actual interacting with people. also, tomorrow i will have mani/pedi and eyebrows done because i totally deserve some beautification.
...debussy helps fighting the stress. it's entrancing, otherwordly and the afternoon of a faun (wow!! nureyev dancing!!!) reminds me this world is not populated only by barbarians. although, given the last few days, i suspect that unfortunately there are too many of them savages. rhetorical question now: why do they tempt me? whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy do they have to mention the middle ages in front of someone who studies this for the fun of it for years now? i bit my tongue not to ask about the chansons de geste, guillaume d'orange, marie de france and what were the actual duties of a knight and how this figure was transformed from the rugged warlord in rusty chain mail into the idealized knight in shining armour..
whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy did i have to hear such preposterous statements such as "good thing we are living in a republic, not a democracy"? seriously, i graduated political science. i know the difference between the one and the other. and the political system that person was talking about was both by all definitions. to be very specific, a republic with representative democracy, because, let's face it, we no longer live in athens to gather every day in the public square in order to vote for every little law/amendment/whatever while the slaves do all the work.
...what most of all annoys me is that we no longer claim we can't have access to information. we live in a world where information, infinite amounts of it are literally at our finger tips. you are interested in something? you can just google it and voila a gazillion pages, opinions, resources. unless you live in a cave you have no excuse for being an intellectual dwarf. and one can't even claim we are controlled by big brother because, people, this is the good part of the communication devices we have now!! we come in contact with so much diversity, which is a GOOD thing and should encourage thinking and even more opinions one can freely express to the world. like i do right now.
......despite some minor exceptions, which shall be filed under the "oh well, there must be some bad parts", air merlins still rock. some of those i know can do some actual magic and create beauty, which make things better

...which was one of those relatively rare moments when i do something else than work (snif) or pine (snif. am turning into bella swan with a slightly deranged edge. no, i don't want to be a vampire, probably for the simple reason i didn't meet one to torment enough). so, i saw the snow white of fire signs brand, which was FUN! the setting was appropriately dark and wonderful in the same time, the wicked queen was spectacular. unfortunately, snow white is somehow constantly shadowed by these other characters. but all in all, i sort of liked it even though poor snow white is no match for the awesome of charlize. but then again we have a love triangle with thor the huntsman (and you know what? the guy snogs better than the duke's son. also, he's more convincing when he cries) and the duke's son who is also a prince, whatever, he's v cute though. and he snogs the snow girl too, but unfortunately he's not a leo so his kissing can't bring her back to life, which was probably one of the biggest surprises. i mean, i am still cheering for the young duke for the simple reason that he is a duke and in the long run more useful to life in general than a drunkard huntsman who spits a lot.
..of course, one might say that the huntsman with no manners brought our heroine back to life and if he wasn't there, we'd have no story to speak of so we can't be ungrateful to him. plus he cries better, as i mentioned earlier. and probably with a lot of determination, he could be taught to behave appropriately.
also, i would like to mention that snow white is v aries in her rallying the troops and marching them to the battlefield. and probably behind the scenes she is pining for the huntsman and will hunt him down with a determination of an angry god just after she finishes the whole "taking back the throne and the kingdom" business.

...especially when you can elope. i love elopements, particularly the secret romantic ones.once upon a time, not so long ago i was thinking that living a life that was the equivalent of a diet of chocolate and champagne (let's make it chili chocolate and rose wine) was...complicated. later developments showed that honestly, it's where i thrive. it's not like i can be happy anywhere else than a wonderful mess... something like this

wedding as in the ariean bff is getting married and this has the potential of creating a whole dimension of ...stuff,  i am not entirely sure of.
other than that, my thoughts on marriage: i don't particularly need it unless it's under the form of secret romantic elopement just the two of us to a secret destination no one else knows. because it's so much more romantic and it's a very effective method of preventing outside influences which might ruin the whole thing. other than that, i'm just as happy with someone i can love, trust and do wildly romantic and inappropriate things.

it's my way of evening out other harsh aspects of life, such as work, money, blah. no so deep inside i am pretty sure i would have made a good lover for a successful yet completely bonkers writer.

dealing with pluto - never easy, i can tell you that, even though i will have to live with it because it is so. what i don't understand though is some people who refuse to be happy. who are scared of being happy. who would rather wallow in their own vats of resentments and fears and stuff that make me go seriously??? like, are you for real???? than actually live and enjoy the plethora of wonderful things out there. yeah, sure, there's a price for everything and consequences to deal with.
also, a thing i noticed. people that i had the longest albeit slightly deranged relationships with, ALL had a plutonian flavor.

from mystic medusa. you know, i so much like the way she provides great insight and useful advice for life in general, unlike some people. and she is a pisces.always trust the piscean intuition, that's almost like a scientific fact.
now back to easter:
* Stolen Pagan Festival. Easter = Oestre – Goddess of the Dawn. Think oestrogen. Oestrus as in heat. HENCE the EGGS.
* Commemorating the death and resurrection of the awesome Jesus Christ. As a vegetarian, anarchist and open-minded dude, he would have surely hated how the Pope & Co go off with moralistic cant this time of year. ( personal thought: you know, as much as i am not too fond of the christian thing, i can't deny the dude had the piscean otherworldly thing and open-mindedness about certain subjects)
* Dairy & cheap sugar laden chocolate that is pale echo of the raw super-foodie power substance of the Ancient Mayans. Yes, Mayans. Let’s throw THEM into the Easter mix.
* Bunnies, Hares, Rabbits – we shoot and eat them but commemorate at Easter in weird throwback to this being a fertility festival. ie; rabbits have a LOT of sex. 

and all this may or may not have a weird connection to the plutonian conversations

that would be the soundtrack for a fascinating afternoon conversation on violinists, russian composers and russian movies. it's one of those things that make life prettier.

when things get too crazy in the real world. like today. seriously!!! the kids were much fun though. we had a bunch of 6-7 y/o visiting the tv with their teacher as part of the different week they do here and i was the guide. the monkey in me was thrilled. plus i got to do yet another impersonation of the tasmanian devil!! did i mention i have a particular fondness for kids that age? and that their presence = recharging batteries. also because they are not shy of touch. sadly, as far as i noticed, only certain arieans project the same energy after they grow up. they are able to revitalize and rejuvenate.
....back to baudelaire now. "Tout cela ne vaut pas le poison qui découle De tes yeux, de tes yeux verts, Lacs où mon âme tremble et se voit à l'envers... " - has been ringing in my head since this morning. sounds a lot like air meets water. sounds a lot like air being fascinated, intrigued and in the same time confused about the watery depths.

you know how astrology says librans' major flaw is being unable to choose? well, looking back (again, a saturn thing) i sort of realize it's more of a boon. waiting, gathering information and not-rushing into anything = things will eventually work out for themselves. that which i would really like to work out faster right now is getting over pms, because it's messing with my inner zen.

so appropriately "shed your skin and be awesomely seductive". red hair, snake bracelets, the hat! omg, the hat!!! it's a lot like embrace your snake goddess side :D now, they should really teach that in school

a de-lovely spring morning. *flounce!
it's feels like the universe is french-kissing me so passionately as to take my breath away and make me drunk and dizzy with happiness. ILU, universe. 

must say, that was one tough question that i've been considering for the past few days, when i was not concerned with the plethora of tv stuff. because it's much easier to say what i don't like in a guy, which is a long and extended list and i am not entirely sure i want to add more items to that.
basically, after mulling over it intensely, making a retrospective (Saturn retrograde stuff) it dawned on me. i like men who like me and show that. i like men who are interested in my tastes, likes and dislikes. i like men who don't take themselves too seriously and are quite social. i like men who are smart, even a little quirky (bonus if i feel that i can learn something from them). i like men who have an artistic streak, are ambitious and have a touch of class. i like men i can rely on and who can make me laugh. i love laughing and wit and teasing. i also like men who can flirt, who open doors (extra bonus for opening the car door) and make all those lovely gentlemanly gestures naturally, who tell me i have pretty feet and hands. doesn't hurt if they're sexy too - which has nothing to do with looks and everything to do with vibes. there are drop dead gorgeous people who are just as sexy as a dead fish and people who may not be models but just ooze sexiness. i want the second variety.

current music: boy with a coin

once upon a time, there was this girl looking for love and she looked into a mirror and saw a man there. the image was so appealing she could hardly resist. so fascinating was the shadow in the mirror she would spend days looking at it, trying to decipher its mysteries. this man, she thought, is the one i need.... and so she created a spell to dissolve the barriers between the mirror world and her world. she told the man "all you have to do is to cross it at midnight" but the man's face changed at this point. she looked closer and saw a face she saw a million times before. she smiled to herself bitterly "you, i know...." and then she heard a twinkly laughter. she turned around and saw the youthful pan. "come and play with me, sister", he said and took her hand

...when i woke up at 5 because it was really cold and i can't wait for heat to be back. in other words: spring. now. okay, it's pure fantasy as real warmth won't be back till late april but so it goes.
other than that, shiny lulz so far. definitely shiny :D and can't wait for the appointment with the now famous hairstylist

i am not entirely sure of what you are doing or how you are doing it but the recent awesomeness of things should not go away ever. let me revel in it for a long long while,
also, a special thank you note goes to the pisceans. because, 1. they are generally right, which is sometimes annoying, but that does not change the fact that they are right. 2. they have their own trademark way of showing they care which will lighten up the darkest hour. mostly, that involves the fact that they know what makes you tick.

"if i kiss you now, will you be silent?".....
pluto survival lesson no. 79: in love and war, all is fair. p.s. love is war.

you know, i am a libra who weighs and fights battles that must be fought. what most often surprised me is that the Other is always told the rules beforehand yet when the Other chooses to ignore them is oh-so-unbelievably-miffed by the fact that i react. what can i say? you should have thought of it before you did it, especially when i was very specific on the things that trigger the wrath.

current music: o,death by jen titus

you know the story. boy meets girl. boy expects girl to act like the saint patron of mercy and forgiveness and understanding towards all his epic fuckwittery ( up to this point is textbook romance). girl sends him to hell - now, THAT is a good story

working hours - a gazzillion (daddy Saturn is kissing me on the forehead from up above for my diligence and survival skills). however, managed today to take bathromm break and a few smoking breaks. also, this past few weeks noticed the management styles of sunsigns and had an in-depth look at the aries-libra polarity.
aries xena is great at mobilizing the troops and instructing them. yeah, she's definitely in the "driving the rest of them with the zeal of a missionary baptizing heathens" philosophy. also, organization - trust the aries to do the job.
on the other hand, the libra will be into the "poll the entire team and then make a decision and let's keep everyone happy". on the other hand, i was repeatedly told this past few weeks that i look mean. possibly helpful in the longterm.
another thing i noticed re: aries - libra. aries has all the assertivness when dealing with the outside world. libra got the asertivness in 1-1 relationships.

look. don't ask. it's been challenging yet ultimately quite rewarding. and then tomorrow we'll start all over again because it's the sort of thing we do, duh.
in other news: snow, freezing cold, snow, ice, wtf. and guess what? tomorrow we'll have MOAR snow and this is why we can't have nice things.

so...stuff. because i haven't written here in what seems like ages and stuff happened with the speed of light and omgjobtvstartsNOWwhyisthisthingnotworkingahitworksthisway. in conclusion: my head aches and my feet are sore or the other way round. also, i am deleriously happy doing this and probably this is why i fit into TV world - my crazy is not so noticeable.i'm quite mellow by those standards.
oh yes, now that i remember - i must see the new wuthering heights. the trailer is so enticing. it contains two quintessential phrases - "you broke my heart. you killed me". oh, the tragedy and the drama of it all!!!

since it's full moon in cancer day whatever-i-saw-the-full-moon-yesterday, let's speak of more astrology. i'll make "follow your bliss" the official aries mantra. they have an unbelievable capacity for doing that. and related to that is "faithful henchman, follow me".
mantra for libra is "i can resist anything but temptation" which is pretty much the opposite of  "follow your bliss" in that librans want bliss to come to them, if possible in the nicest and most seductive way possible plzthks.

and to quote from my favourite astrologer, mystic medusa:

“…I am the Passion of Lightning and the Command of Thunder,

What exists, IS, because I have Willed it To Be.

I am the Queen of Heaven in a Mansion of Fire,

I am First among those in the Great Sky-Boat of Eternity…”

From Hymn To Sekhmet



"FUQ YEAH Sekhmet!

I would totally go to church every Sunday if it was more like this.

It would presumably be completely fine to bring cats + our illegitimate children and/or illicit lovers, yes?" (i subscribe to that)
and by the way, i did some astro research and found out that i have asteroids ishtar and godiva conjunct in leo. (and that sounds extremely well. almost like having a inner point of golden awesome in my life. and some holy enjoyment of all the fine things in life)

because so far it brought:
one job, two upcoming weddings in the summer and three fancy things i had at the new years' eve party (french wine, duck with raisin/figs/peach sauce and ridiculously expensive chocolate which came into a very pretty package. excuse me while i fawn over that concept a little longer. french wine and ridiculously expensive chocolate which came into a very pretty package while listening to muse. it just makes everything better)

i say: let's keep the good things rolling!